Lucy: Y'know Eff, remember when it was warm outside?
Ethel: It was warm outside? when was that?
Lucy: Back before they brought that Sally Dog in the house.
Ethel: You mean the whack job that chases her tail and barks at her reflection in the mirror?
Lucy: Yeah, her, but I'm talking about when it was warm, remember that?
Ethel: I guess, I have trouble remembering what I bought last with my credit card. By the way, I ordered us new squeaky squirrels!
Lucy: How do you do that?
Ethel: On Kricket's computer. She leaves it open on the chair all the time!
Lucy: Well how'd you get a credit card? I thought only humans had those?
Ethel: Hey, it came in the mail. I applied online. And I pay the bill by filling out shopper surveys. People are stupid, they have no idea I'm a dog!
Lucy: So how do you decide what to buy?
Ethel: It's tough. Though since Chris started getting all those Orvis catalogues, it's been easier. I even use the discount code on the back of it.
Lucy: You don't buy anything for Sally, do you? She gets to sleep on the bed, and I don't.
Ethel: Don't worry, I got you a "dog's nest" with an orthopedic support for your bad back. It's even heated!
Lucy: You're the best older sister a dog could have, you know that? I love you girl.
Ethel: Ditto, but thanks for saying that. and try and show some love for Sally, it's going to get warm again soon, and she will spend more time outside.
Lucy: Which means more time for us at the food bowl, right?
Ethel: Now you're getting it.
Lucy: I hate winter
Ethel: Me too. Now lets tell Sally that we think there's a stray cat in the yard, so she'll want to go out.
Lucy: Okay! If it gets her away from the food bowl, I'm all for it!