Ethel Mae Casey, Super Consumer!

Meet Miss Ethel Mae Casey, at least that's what we call her, and that's what her name is on somebody's mailing list.
Isn't she cute? She is a very happy dog. She likes to chase bunnies, stroll in the swamp, and roll around in the various poop of our indigenous neighbors, like the deer, the foxes, and even the possums.
Apparently, according to someones database out there, she likes to shop! So today in the mail, she gets the following:


Inviting her to participate in a shoppers survey. Now we have had our suspicions about Ethel, what with the wireless system somehow getting turned on, the mysterious credit card charges to Orvis, and the miscellaneous toys, treats, and padded beds that keep showing on the porch, but now this confirms it!

Fortunately I intercepted this survey before she could fill it out!

Under Charitable causes, I have no doubt she would have checked, "Animal shelter, and under Occupation, "Retired."

There is a section titled "weight Management" which she does relate to, food wise, but under Leisure activities, I'd have to say "Sleeping."

Finally, the last page says if she fills it out and returns it by October 13th, she will be entered to win an additional $2500 dollars! Now that's tempting, almost makes me want to let her do it.

Here's an excerpt from their letter to Ethel:

"Dear Shopper,

As a Pennsylvania resident, you lay a key role in our consumer Surveys. (Really! Our Ethel, AKA Snuffy?! Who Knew!) Once in a while we carefully select individuals in your community - those whom we feel represent the smartest, most value conscious shoppers.

(Oh yeah, that's our Snuffy dog, smart and budget conscious!) Then we use some of our research budget to find out exactly what these smart shoppers really want. (Must be one hell of a budget!)

If our hunch is right, you are such a person. (I hope you guys already got paid!) That's why I'm sending you this private invitation through the mail."

I'm going to skip ahead here, to my favorite part:

"As the Main Grocery Shopper in your household - when you speak your mind, Better products get to market".

Yep, our dog does make the market better. She especially likes the Natural Dog Biscuits fortified with Vitamins and 6 minerals that you can only buy at Sam's club. She likes Nutro dog food for Senior Dogs, but also likes an occasional plain McDonald's hamburger, served after a visit to the Puppy wash.

At the Puppy wash her hair is washed in a creme rinse, giving it that soft feel, and fragrant smell, that only helps to keep her smelling fresh until she finds someone's fresh poop to roll in. Yep, Snuffy's doing her part to help get better products to the market!

On Top of all this, for serving as an OFFICIAL PENNSYLVANIA PARTICIPANT in OUR 2008 Consumer Product Survey of America, Ethel , aka "Snuffy" could win a lot of money. What is sad is we still get credit card offers for her all the time. I toss them in the shredder. That's where this is headed now. But I'm going to give her and the other two dogs a treat first. They deserve it. It's hard work being the subject of a blog, for a dog.

Gee what's next, is she registered to Vote? Oh My God, What if she's a Supervoter!!! Will Sarah Palin make her an official Iditarod spokesdog? Will Joe Biden offer to make her an honorary drug sniffing dog for the DEA? God help us!