I Had a "SlingBlade" moment.

I like to spend some solitary time on Sunday at Fairview Cemetery on South Lehigh Street in Allentown. Every week I mow and weed whack around markers in sections O, N, and P. Every other week I hit 5 specific graves in other sections. Three are Revolutionary War veterans, and one was a Battlefield Surgeon in the fifth PA Regiment during the Civil War at the Battle of the Wilderness. The Fifth grave is for a Sgt William Miller, who served in a PA Artillery regiment at Fort McHenry during the War of 1812.

Someday I will get around to doing some kind of virtual tour of the Fairview Cemeteries' more notable residents, but for now I want to share my "Karl" moment this past Sunday.
I was mowing away around Lt Saeger's grave (Rev War) when the mower started acting up.

I thought maybe it was overheating, so when I finished there I rolled it under some trees and into the shade while I weed whacked. I went over to Sgt Miller's grave and started cleaning up debris, and when I started the mower a few minutes later it fired right up. For about 30 seconds.
I would prime it, pull the starter, and it would run a few seconds before dying. I checked the oil, and it was fine.

Wait for it........ Yes, it was out of gas.I had 4 gallons of fuel with me, but forgot to fill it before leaving the house.

There is a scene in Slingblade where they bring Karl a mower that won't run, and he fixes it by putting fuel in it.

All together now: DUH!

Mowing at the Cemetery!

Well, it was a beautiful Spring day here in the Lehigh Valley, and I did what I needed to do, and hadn't done since November 4th. I mowed most of Section N at Fairview Cemetery. Those of you who followed my old Lehigh Valley POV blog know that this is the family plot of my wife's family.

Fairview was founded in the 1820's and many of Allentown's most famous are buried there, including three Revolutionary War Veterans, and the Commanding General of Pennsylvania's units, General James Craig. He was in his late 80s, btw, when he died.

Anyhow, dead people don't complain about Charity. Nobody complains about my weed whacking or whose graves I didn't get too. This place is 26 acres, and has a budget of $12,ooo for maintenance. FOR THE YEAR. It had a major embezzlement a decade ago, and some places are in disrepair. The owner of the Funeral home on the property is not responsible for the upkeep, but does what he can with what he has, managing to keep the access roads clear and mowing what he can. He has thanked me many times for what I, and a few other volunteers do.

So on a beautiful sunny, late April day, I was out in the solitude of a beautiful cemetery, giving three hours of my time to work in section N and part of neighboring section S. Nobody complained about how I cut the grass, or the pattern I did it in. I picked up the beer bottles/cans, and food wrappers left by the gang bangers who hang out in there at night, and made a list of gravestones that they knocked over and I need to get help to move back.

I don't get overwhelmed by the size of the task, I just take it one thing, one section at a time. I just wish they would quit destroying the emblems marking all the Veteran's graves. As A veteran, that is the one thing that gets me mad. Oh well.

A New Member to the "Tools of Terror" Family!

Okay, so maybe this tool isn't so terrifying, but it sure is fun to use!

It's a Poulan gas powered Leaf Blower/Vacuum/Mulcher that comes with a bag!

ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There's nothing that gets the testosterone flowing for a guy, like holding a small engine in his hands, that is subtly vibrating with Horsepower! There's something about pulling the choke halfway out, and yanking on that starter chain a half dozen times, that puts a guy in the mood to do something manly. (Don't worry folks, I'll explain why you shouldn't "Yank someone else's chain" is a future post.)

Now before you start asking, "Chris, what the hell do you need a leaf blower for, don't you have a rake?" Let me explain. You ever tried raking a cemetery? Fairview is 16 sections comprising 26 acres, you see, and I can't get to them all. Or how about walking around from marker to marker with a broom, knocking all the cut grass off? That takes time. With the gas powered leaf blower, I just aim and FIRE! Blows them markers clean in one pass!
So now I can walk the graves with my weed whacker, and then come back by with the leaf blower. Bool Yah! It will look like a professional is taking care of the place!

And who do we have to thank for this new gas powered Tool of Terror to yard waste?

The beloved Mrs C.

She asked me what I wanted for my impending 47th Birthday. I thought long and hard, before saying "A new 25' measuring tape."
But that wasn't enough for her. As we walked the aisles at Lowes, she tried to convince me I needed the $200 Leaf blower that came in a back pack that made it easy to carry, and boy was I tempted. With that baby strapped on, I would be the envy of men at work in yards everywhere.

But my rational thought center in my head took control. The Backpack version was a WANT, not a NEED. There was a cheap-O gas powered version, but it didn't vacuum or mulch. So I ended up suggesting the best value, which was the Poulan. Mrs. C was happy, I was happy, and I'm sure all the souls at Fairview are happy I keep their final resting place as tidy as I can.

Everybody wins! Now I just have to watch out and make sure I don't stumble into any more of those portals to Hell out there!

Sally's Excellent Cemetery Adventure!

Wednesday Afternoon I hauled the mower and weed whacker down to Fairview for a couple hours of work, I stopped by home after work, and decided to take one of the dogs, our ADD child, Sally, with me.

This is Sally at our home. Sally blows thru the Invisible Fence, ignoring the shocks, so we reluctantly had to put a 35 foot tie out line on her. Wednesday I took it to the Cemetery with me, clicked the hook on the tailgate latch of my car, after judiciously parking where she could see me at all times, but not get herself tangled up anywhere to easily.

It's pretty quiet there, despite all the surrounding city sounds, and I would stop every few minutes and call to her, just to keep her calm. She was really giving the nearby wildlife hell, and when a groundhog scooted nearby, I really thought she might drag the car down the road after it. Then about 5 Pm I saw something happen that gave me chills. It might have been the sun going behind the clouds, and the wind picking up, but I'm pretty sure it was what I was seeing that chilled me.

Sally was sitting up as if she was being petted, wagging her tail, and jumping up as if to climb on someones leg.

But There was Nobody there.

Okay, I'm at a Cemetery. That comes with a bit of spookiness to begin with. But Sally was doing this over by my Mother in Law's grave. Dogs have superior senses to we humans, in ways we don't understand. When I finished mowing, I walked over to find Sally laying in front of my Wife's family plot, at my Mother in law's marker. Her tie out could reach dozens of markers, but that's the one she decided to lay in front of. The Squirrels were across the road, and knowing her, I would have thought that was where her attention would be.

Coincidence? happenstance? I don't think so.